The Return to Llama

I never realised how happy I would be to arrive in Lima. Up there as one of the more forgettable cities in South America, I didnt think I would be overjoyed to get back. But after 27 hours on the bus and getting ripped off 20 Sols by a dodgy cab driver, we arrived at the Red Psycho Llama to see half the people we met there the first time. It was great to see Jimmy from Manchester, Aviv from Israel and the super friendly local staff. Good times!!!

Long bus rides leave you frazzled and dazed. After that long in one spot you dont know if you are hungry, tired, restless, energetic, thirsty, relieved or angry. You are mostly stinky and dehydrated. On my bus trip I came up with a fresh top ten list. Just call me Christy Lettermen.

Top 10 things you actually did on a 24 bus ride

1. After putting off going to toilet for 5 hours, get the nerve to brave the rank banos, squat above the seat then fall off and head butt the door when the driver takes a corner
2. Watch incredible sunsets over magnificent Peruvian mountain ranges
3. At the border crossing, walk from Bolivia into Peru then check your passport, realise that Bolivia has stamped you as exiting in 2018 and have to walk back to get restamped
4. Plan the set list for your bands imagined reunion
5. Eat the rice around the wrinkly chicken in the free dinner
6. Jump for joy when you get the chance to get out at the servo for a leg stretch, then try to ask the guy next to you in Spanish where the bus is going and is it coming back to get us when the bus drives away
7. Get back on the bus and resolve to never get off again at servos
8. Eat an entire packet of Oreos and then feel like vomiting except the banos are so gross its not an option
9. Read the first four pages of 100 Years of Solitude again
10. Imagine yourself in Mexico in 24 hours

And thats the current sich my friends. I am tired and my body hurts but I am about to watch the football with my new old Llama crew and awake refreshed and ready to roll.